The Old Man and the Moped

A hip young man goes out and buys the best car available: a 1997, Turbo
BeepBeep. It is the best and most expensive car in the world, and it runs
him $500,000. He takes it out for a spin and, while doing so, stops for a
red light. An old man on a moped (both looking about 90 years old) pulls
up next to him. The old man looks over the sleek, shiny surface of the car
and asks, "What kind of car ya' got there, sonny?".

The young man replies "A 1997 Turbo BeepBeep. They cost $500,000. "That's
a lot of money" says the old man, shocked. "Why does it cost so much?

"Because this car can do up to 320 miles an hour!" states the cool dude
proudly.

The moped driver asks, "Can I take a look inside? "Sure" replies the 
owner.

So, the old man pokes his head in the window and looks around. Leaning
back on his moped, the old man says "That's a pretty nice car, all right!"

Just then, the light changes, so the guy decides to show the old man what
his car can do. He floors it, and within 30 seconds the speedometer reads
320 mph.

Suddenly, he notices a dot in his rear view mirror.  It seems to be 
getting closer! He slows down to see what it could be and suddenly, 
whhhoooossshhh! Something whips by him, going much faster!

"What on earth could be going faster than my Turbo BeepBeep?" the young
man asks himself.

Then, ahead of him, he sees a dot coming toward him. Whoooooosh! It goes
by again, heading the opposite direction! And, it almost looked like the
old man on the moped! "Couldn't be," thinks the guy. "How could a moped
outdo a Turbo BeepBeep?"

Again, he sees a dot in his rear view mirror!  Whooooosh Ka-BbblaMMM! It
plows into the back of the car, demolishing the rear end.  The young man
jumps out, and Jesus to Betsy, it is the old man!! Of course the moped and
the old man are hurting for certain. He runs up to the ailing old man and
says, "You're hurt bad! Is there anything I can do for you?"

The old man groans and replies "Yeah. Unhook my elastic suspenders from
your side-view mirror!"